I serve a King

Every one of those words are important. The Lord comforted me with those words last night. I suffered a small set back yesterday. I got word that I was no longer being considered for a promotion at work. I'm happy to say that I didn't respond with the same angry outbursts I have in the past but my response could have been better. I kinda pouted a little. I moped and felt sorry for myself a little bit. Then in the middle of the night, the really haunting thoughts had a right to come and torment me because I didn't cast them down. In the middle of the night, I was attacked with whispers of despair: "You'll never get promoted." "You're doing the best you can and that's not good enough for them" "You're running out of time" "You're never going to succeed." "You are going to be struggling for the rest of your life." These thoughts had every right to pester me because I didn't take those thoughts of self-pity captive and cast them down when they first cropped up. Oh well, live and learn. It made for a long night of struggle. I didn't sleep well and I still have to go back to work today. Thankfully, when we cry out, Our Heavenly Father hears us and comes to our aid.

In the midst of those dizzying thoughts about how difficult it's going to be for me to get my career in gear, the Lord comforted me with the words: You serve a King. You see, the major frustration I have met in my life is that I can't seem to get my own little kingdom built and running on autopilot so I can go devote my life to building His kingdom. For as long as I can remember, I've tried to sell God on the idea of helping me get financially free so I can concentrate on doing the work of the Kingdom without having to worry about money. And for as long as I can remember, He has declined to help me. He keeps insisting that if I just commit all I have to serving Him, He will set me up with more than I can ever dream or imagine. He assures me that if I lose myself in the pursuit of His Kingdom, I will have added to me all that I could ever want. Last night, I think He made some real progress in convincing me. In His still small voice, He reminded me that Max Miller is long dead. Max's kingdom with all its sordid memories is forever abolished never to be rebuilt and my time is better spent building The Kingdom. That quieted the storm for me.

I stepped away from the howling winds of my own goals and committed myself again to serving my King. I serve The King. Every word in that sentence is significant.

I; my mind, my ears, my eyes, my mouth, my hands and feet, all that can be described as Max Miller....

Serve; put highest priority on, seek permission from, seek direction from, obey completely and quickly...

The King; the ruler and creator of the universe, the Supreme Authority.

I no longer serve my own goals. I am free from the burden of trying to orchestrate the forces of nature and people to promote the kingdom of Max Miller. It is not important that Max Miller be applauded and promoted. It's no longer one of my priorities to plan for the financial well-being and comfort of Max Miller. Max Miller had his opportunity to indulge his every impulse and pursue his every goal. He failed. It is now time to devote the resources to a much higher purpose. A purpose that has a much better chance of succeeding. The hands, feet, mind and time that once belonged to Max Miller, now belong to Jesus Christ. Any use of these resources for the lesser purpose of making Max Miller happy will be considered embezzling. The comfort and happiness of Max Miller is no longer my concern. That duty belongs to my King. He promises to lift me from the dung hill to sit me with Princes. He promises to pour out so much blessing on me that I won't have room to contain it all. He promises to add to me all the food, clothing and housing I will ever need. Any effort on my part to help in that effort will only delay progress. I serve a King.

So what am I supposed to do with my time and effort now? Well, I woke up this morning and made sure my mind and spirit were properly calibrated. I got up out of bed and reminded myself of what God told me during the night. I serve a King. This day belongs to Him. He has things He wants to do through me today. The quickest route to my destination is to drive straight towards His goals for the day. I commit myself to doing this with gusto and fierce conviction. I won't tinker around with this. I won't "see how it goes." I will keep my mind and spirit alert to detect His voice. I will quickly obey his direction. I will live and die with whatever consequences come from doing this. I will stake my entire happiness on this. I will find my fulfillment and joy in SERVING MY KING. I am finally ready to repent of serving my own appetites. Forgive me for all the years that I have wasted Lord. Today, I will serve you well and I trust you to keep your promises. I am no longer concerned about the promotion at work, I seek only YOUR promotion. Thank you for your comforting presence Lord.